Love Yourself First! Friday (LYFF) shares stories of phenomenal women who fiercely demonstrate self-love in action in order to build and sustain healthy, positive self esteem.
Want to share your self-love story with us? We certainly hope so! You would definitely be among our strong, courageous collective of women, here, who – through their experiences – learned to fully embrace, accept, and love who they are.
Ready to share? Send an email here. Put “My LYFF Story” in the subject line, and we’ll send you follow-up information. Sweet. Short. Simple!
Stories post bi-weekly on Fridays.
And lastly, a big THANK YOU to all our LYFF participants. Your powerful journeys have empowered someone else’s life.
I like fitness, but I also like to eat. I would assume the latter part of that sentence is true for most people. I mean, seriously, food is good and we need it to survive. That is why I am not a big fan of diets. Instead, I believe in eating the right amount of good food at the right time.
As part of my Tabata Bootcamp program, I talk to my clients about nutrition. Nutrition is an extremely important part of your life and fitness program. Bad nutrition can completely sabotage a great workout.
Every time you sit down to eat ask yourself three simple questions:
Am I hungry?
Is it a good choice?
How much do I need?
Many times we eat out of boredom: While we’re sitting at the computer, watching a movie, or reading a book. Or we eat because it is convenient: At a party, “food day” at work, or meals sent over by relatives. Before you eat, ask yourself if you are really hungry. If your answer is “no”, stop there! Also, try drinking a glass of water then waiting. Our stomach sends the same signal to our brains for thirst as it does for hunger. You may think you are hungry and really you may just be thirsty.
If you truly are ready for a meal or a snack, the next question should be, “is it a good choice?”. Yes, you may be hungry, but a Snickers bar from the vending machine is not a good choice. Instead, pack carrot sticks, cucumber slices, almonds, low-fat cheese, pistachios, or fruit. If you are at dinner, go for the whole grains and lean meat such as fish or baked chicken instead of fried foods or red meat.
The last important question is about portion. I grew up in an Italian family where you were expected to eat the full portion and usually a second helping as well. However, despite your family’s expectations or what society tells us, we do not need to finish everything on our plates. In fact, most restaurants give us way TOO MUCH food! Eat slow and drink lots of water. When you are full…stop! If you are at a restaurant, immediately ask for a to-go box and box up half of your meal before you even take a bite. This will remove the temptation to eat it all. This last question is also important if you allow yourself to have dessert: Take a few bites, but you do not need to eat the whole piece (or whole bag of cookies)!
Food Journaling:
I also recommend finding an accountability partner. Together keep a food journal. Write down everything you eat during the day and then at the end of the week share you journal with your partner. If you know someone is checking your progress, you are less likely to eat the bacon cheeseburger and fries.
There are great apps available as well to help you track your food intake, such as MyFitnessPal.
Fitness and nutrition go hand in hand. If you are committed to living a healthy lifestyle, don’t forget the importance of healthy food choices. Step away from the diet and choose to use the Take Three Method.
In health, fitness, and love!
Megan
Want more details on The Take Three Method? Well, take a look at the Tabata Bootcamp Nutrition Guide. For additional fitness coaching, contact Megan here.
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About the Contributing Writer:
Megan Weidner is the Health + Wellness contributor for The Phoenix Rising Collective; she is a fitness coach and environmentalist in the Akron/Canton, Ohio area. She manages a global sustainability and corporate responsibility program for a large multinational company; her areas include environmental compliance, social equity, community engagement and health and wellness. Megan is also devoted to Rock. It. Fitness., her fitness and natural skincare business. She is committed to making the world a better, more environmentally friendly and healthier place through motivation and education. She is certified through AFAA and Tabata Bootcamp. She has a B.S. in Soil, Environmental, and Atmospheric Science (University of Missouri), a Graduate Certificate in Environmental Management and Policy (University of Denver) and an M.P.A (University of Missouri). She lives in Green, Ohio with her husband and three kids.
Believe it, Phoenix! Great things DO happen to you everyday – big and small. You can recognize them by choosing to live in the moment.
Practice mindfulness. Take a few deep breaths and just be present.
In the words of Jon Kabat-Zinn, “Practice sharing the fullness of your being, your best self, your enthusiasm, your vitality, your spirit, your trust, your openness, above all, your presence. Share it with yourself, with your family, with the world.” (Book: Wherever You Go, There You Are: Mindfulness Meditation in Everyday Life)
Tip: As a way to express gratitude for and assist you in the practice of recognizing those great things (big and small) that happen in your day, journal about them or share the experiences with someone who will appreciate and support what you’re doing, the new, positive habit you’re creating. Notice how these simple, yet very impactful, exercises shift your perspective and overall mood.
Mindfulness is integral to your commitment to be self-love in action. Practice!
Love Yourself First! Friday (LYFF) is part of ourShed Lightseries collection. We invite women to tell their LYFF stories to inspire and empower others to also fiercely demonstrate self-love in action. The questions are meant to “shed light” on various ways our featured Phoenixes are making self-care and intentional living a priority.
This week’s inspiring Phoenix is Monique:
How do you love yourself first? What does that mean to you?
Loving myself first means realizing my own value and walking in that light at all times. Loving myself first means understanding that I am worthy of all of the positivity, joy, and PEACE of mind that I can experience in my God-given 24 hours – without guilt or hesitation. Loving myself first means believing I am worth it not because someone else told me so; because my Creator made it so!
What actions demonstrate the self-care you provide to your mind, body, and soul?
I demonstrate the love I have for myself by making sure that what I take in physically, spiritually, and mentally is beneficial to MY health. From drinking water and walking to daily prayer and keeping a positive circle around me; I strive daily to honor the God within by treating myself well. Some days are more challenging than others, but with each new day, there is another opportunity for me to improve in self-love, and for that I am grateful!
Is there an obstacle or challenge that you’ve overcome that led you to a deeper love for who you are?
Experiencing separation, divorce, and the challenges of rebuilding my life showed me where I needed to grow as a person. I had time to reflect on the mistakes I made and the reality that I really didn’t love myself, making it impossible to truly love someone else. Through those experiences, I learned that in order to heal and move forward, I had to first love myself enough to forgive – forgive others, and most importantly, forgive myself. Guilt, shame, and doubt were like weights around my neck. Once I shed those, I NEVER looked back. I knew God had more for me, and I was ready to go after it.
What have you learned from self-love?
From self-love, I have learned that as a woman I have the power to attract who and what I am into my circumference. All of my relationships are mirrors of some aspect of me, whether good or bad. Negativity doesn’t just magically appear; I either cause it or allow it in my life. Period. Love for self doesn’t produce victims; it gives birth to survivors. Once love for self became more than a cliché and actually became my way of life, I began to repel what didn’t add to my life, and I attracted genuine love in return. On June 17, I will celebrate 3 years of marriage to the man I believe God sent to me. And I am enjoying the journey of finally meeting the Monique I never knew. When I look at myself five years ago and now, all I can say is God is the Greatest!
Monique’s LYFF Collage:
We asked our Phoenix, Monique, to submit photos demonstrating self-love in action or even photos that radiate the feeling of loving who she is. We created a collage (shown above) of the images she wanted to share. Here’s what she had to say about why these authentically reflect her self-love: “The photos I have chosen are a powerful testimony of the transformation that loving God and myself have caused in my life!”
Thanks for sharing your self-love story with us, Monique. You are definitely a Phoenix Rising!
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If you’d like to share your self-love story with The Collective contact us here.
Love Yourself First! Friday is a bi-weekly self-love series created by The Phoenix Rising Collective. Beautiful, diverse women tell stories of triumph, share personal affirmations, and declare love for their lives! The series is meant to inspire and empower women to fiercely demonstrate self-love in action in order to build and sustain healthy, positive self-esteem. Be sure to read some of our other inspiring stories.
A few weeks ago, I held my first “beginner” class at a studio in Green, Ohio. The participants were shy and nervous, but they ROCKED it! So many of the women in my class had not exercised in years; some had injuries, most were not happy with their current weight, but all were motivated to make a change. Because of that motivation, they ventured out in a particularly cold and snowy northeast Ohio night to let some stranger work them out. The most exciting thing about this whole experience is that these ladies were NOT beginners! My classes are not easy; even when the title of the class says “beginner”, it is a tough workout. Too often, the first step is to believe in ourselves; to know that we simply…can.
My point to all of this? Do not underestimate yourself and what you can do. If you haven’t exercised in months, years, or never in your life – start now! Now is your time. Start slow and find something that you enjoy. You don’t need to spend a lot of money on a gym membership or a trainer; most things you can do in the comfort of your home. A trainer or fitness coach is great for motivation and for showing you how to do new exercises, but again, don’t underestimate you.
Below are a couple of example workouts to get you started and for additional motivation!
Consult a physician before engaging in any type of workout. Warm up and cool down adequately.
Lunge Demonstration – Megan Weidner, The PRC Health + Wellness Contributor
Workout #1 – Lunges
High knees (step or jog) 20 seconds, rest 10 seconds
Side lunges alternating sides 20 seconds, rest 10 seconds
Repeat both
Jumping jacks (step to the side or jump) 20 seconds, rest 10 seconds
Step back lunges alternating legs 20 seconds, rest 10 seconds
Repeat both
Push-ups (from floor or wall; you can drop your knees on the floor and push up) 20 seconds, rest 10 seconds
Plank 20 seconds, rest 10 seconds
Workout #2 – Burpees
Tabata: Burpees – 20 seconds; and 10 second rest (Repeat 8 times)
Jump or step side to side 20 seconds, 10 second rest
Squat walk (squat position, take two steps forward and two steps back, repeat) 20 seconds, 10 second rest
Repeat
Here’s How to Do a Burpee:
Start by adding a simple 6-minute workout each day. Most of my clients find that getting the short exercises completed in the morning is best for energy levels and for their schedules.
In health, fitness, and love,
Megan
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Megan Weidner is the Health + Wellness contributor for The Phoenix Rising Collective; she is a fitness coach and environmentalist in the Akron/Canton, Ohio area. She manages a global sustainability and corporate responsibility program for a large multinational company; her areas include environmental compliance, social equity, community engagement and health and wellness. Megan is also devoted to Rock. It. Fitness., her fitness and natural skincare business. She is committed to making the world a better, more environmentally friendly and healthier place through motivation and education. She is certified through AFAA and Tabata Bootcamp. She has a B.S. in Soil, Environmental, and Atmospheric Science (University of Missouri), a Graduate Certificate in Environmental Management and Policy (University of Denver) and an M.P.A (University of Missouri). She lives in Green, Ohio with her husband and three kids.
Love Yourself First! Friday (LYFF) is part of ourShed Light series collection. We invite women to tell their LYFF stories to inspire and empower others to also fiercely demonstrate self-love in action. The questions are meant to “shed light” on various ways our featured Phoenixes are making self-care and intentional living a priority.
This week’s inspiring Phoenix is Lizzie:
How do you love yourself first? What does that mean to you?
Loving myself first has been a work in progress because my kids are still very young and it seems natural for mothers to put their family’s needs before themselves. However, as I grow older, I have realized that it’s important to reserve some daily down-time for me. I make time to practice yoga often and try to incorporate meditation. I am a highly goal-oriented person who loves to live at a fast past; therefore, my yoga practice helps me to focus and quiet my soul. I have discovered that when I begin my day with yoga and meditation, my day seems so much calmer, and it feels like I have been kind to my spirit, so the act of loving myself first is quieting my spirit and taking time to just listen to what God wants me to hear for the day.
I also like to reward myself with “spa days.” I enjoy just getting away for the day to be pampered – leaving all the kid-chauffeuring to my husband.
Lizzie’s first half marathon: “Running is spiritual for me and that is why I don’t even listen to any music while I run.”
What actions demonstrate the self-care you provide to your mind, body, and soul? (Exercise, healthy eating, spiritual practice, etc)
I truly believe in the connection of mind, body, and spirit. Before kids, I used to run daily, and I went to the gym twice a day (in the morning before work and back again after work) in order to make it back home just in time to have dinner with my husband. Yes, exercise and good health were my life before kids. After all, I lived on the East coast and that was the thing to do. Just last year, I decided to rekindle my old hobby of running and completed my first Half Marathon in Columbus, Ohio. This was probably one of my most exciting days that gave me such a sense of accomplishment (as seen on my photo wearing my medal). Running is spiritual for me and that is why I don’t even listen to any music while I run. It’s a Zen moment where I just want to feel the wind and hear all the natural sounds.
I love to set goals, and my quest to achieve them fuels me, and I feel good about myself. I also love to travel and see the world. My most sacred place is anywhere near the ocean. The ocean’s power and serenity reminds of the glory of God. My most memorable vacations are in locations where I can hear the relaxing sound of the ocean. I cannot think of anything more calming.
Is there an obstacle or challenge that you’ve overcome that led you to a deeper love for who you are?
Three years ago, I had to make an emergency trip to South Africa because my mother had encountered a serious cardiac illness. After returning from that visit in January, I was so thankful that God had graciously spared her life and wanted to focus more on gratitude. I then made a conscious effort to give up meat during the month of January. I chose January because I do not believe in setting resolutions; instead, I set goals. Consequently, January has become my month of thanksgiving, fasting, and focusing more on what goes into my body. I use this time to slow down and focus more on loving my body and appreciating my life.
What have you learned from self-love?
Self-love raises my awareness of how important it is to remember to take care of myself. Because I am an extrovert, I have to constantly remind myself that I do not always have to engage in external activities. Literally, I feel like my being craves stillness each day. I am very comfortable with being alone in stillness or immersed in a good book. Consequently, my next goal for this year is to begin to take at least one annual mini vacation by myself just to relax and pamper myself. I am calling these trips a “mommy hiatus.”
Lizzie’s LYFF Collage:
We asked Lizzie to also submit photos demonstrating self-love in action or even photos that radiate the feeling of loving who she is. We created a collage (shown above) of the awesome images she wanted to share.
Lizzie selected these images because “the first one (top right) represents my love of the ocean. This was on vacation in Jamaica, a place that I love! My second photo (bottom left) is of my yoga practice – warrior pose! And the last one (bottom right) is my first half marathon day in Columbus, Ohio with my medal.”
Below is also a quote that she loves and shared with us; it describes her love and comfortability with being alone.
Thank you for sharing your self-love story, Lizzie! You are definitely a Phoenix Rising.
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If you’d like to share your self-love story with The Collective contact us here.
Love Yourself First! Friday is a bi-weekly self-love series created by The Phoenix Rising Collective. Beautiful, diverse women tell stories of triumph, share personal affirmations, and declare love for their lives! The series is meant to inspire and empower women to fiercely demonstrate self-love in action in order to build and sustain healthy, positive self-esteem. Be sure to read some of our other inspiring stories.
Sometimes (well, most of the time) all you need is a deep breath to bring clarity to a situation and/or to lighten the load. Whether it’s a big decision you have to make or a matter of seeing things from a different perspective, don’t hold your breath in the process of figuring it out. Breathe.
Release anxiety and worry by slowly and consciously inhaling and exhaling your way through it. Surrender. And with each exhale visualize what letting go looks like for you.
Lastly, repeat an affirmation that supports this intentional breathing practice; here are a few of my favorite:
I am easily and divinely guided to solve my challenges. All is well.
I let go and the universe lovingly takes care of me.
I am light and love; it exudes from me and is part of all that I do.
I commit to peace within myself and to peace with others.
Take a breath! Be self-love in action. Happy Sunday, Phoenix! Create a positive week.
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Ayanna Jordan is the founder and Editor-in-Chief of The Phoenix Rising Collective. She has always had a passion for inspiring others, particularly women, and especially through writing, coaching, and teaching. She is happy The PRC provides an opportunity for her to write about one of her favorite topics: self-care, as she believes that true wellness begins within – healing old wounds, forgiving others (and yourself), letting go of the past, eating healthy foods, making room for change, sustaining a positive attitude, and taking time for spiritual practice, are all a part of the journey to authenticity. Right now, she is most inspired by Love Yourself First! Friday. Learn more about it HERE.
In addition to meeting with my therapist bi-weekly, I love reading John Tsilimparis’ Retrain Your Anxious Brain to help conquer the anxiety. I was catching up on my HeyFranHey when I came across her post recommending it. The book offers practical and effective tools to create a path toward more positive thinking as well as changing responses to anxiety triggers. What I really enjoy about his book is the way in which it encourages readers to dig deep into and take charge of their lives. It has helped me understand and make a distinction between stress and anxiety. Additionally, it helps me identify or break down negative thinking patterns, and assists in turning negative thoughts into life-affirming and spirit-affirming thoughts.
Retrain Your Anxious Brain is a powerful spiritual guide because it inspires personal growth in all aspects of my life. It reminds me that I have the power to control my reality and reduce anxiety. It teaches me that I don’t have to battle anxiety; that instead, I need to let go of having control. It is surrendering, not fighting, that must take place.
What I am most excited about getting to (I haven’t finished the book just yet and will likely reread it) are the sections on building responsibility and creating a daily accountability plan! The plan focuses on creating a morning ritual or adding to the one you already have. The plan helps you avoid triggers like boredom, and helps you fill your day with activities or chores such as making your bed each morning or meeting a friend for tea.
Retrain Your Anxious Brain helps me work from spirit rather than ego and guides me in manifesting spiritual alignment. I have noticed that I judge myself less and am more interested in thanking the Creator for my journey and the process. It reminds me that I am spirit, and I am powerful. I have been able to create more balance, and a more positive personal belief system/outlook on life and reality.
I recommend Retrain Your Anxious Brain to anyone who is looking to create a life of gratitude, love, and balance.
Hey, Phoenix! Have you read this book? If so, tell us, in the comment section below, how it has created more balance in your life and supported your personal growth.
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About The Phoenix Book of the Week:
The Phoenix Book of the Week features book recommendations from The Phoenix Rising Collective, as well as the empowered women who support us. We’ll be sharing our thoughts on books that have been powerful resources for sustaining healthy self-esteem, creating emotional and spiritual wellness, and committing to intentional living. We’ll also share our personal stories about how and why the books have inspired personal growth and sparked “light bulb moments” that changed our lives in some way. The book picks may cover a wide range of topics from diverse genres.
Interested in sharing a book with us? Please click here to send your request for more details on submitting a book entry.
Love Yourself First! Friday (LYFF) is part of ourShed Light series collection. We invite women to tell their LYFF stories to inspire and empower others to also fiercely demonstrate self-love in action. The questions are meant to “shed light” on various ways our featured Phoenixes are making self-care and intentional living a priority.
This week’s courageous Phoenix is DeDe:
How do you love yourself first? What does that mean to you?
Loving myself first means – putting myself first and being okay with it. I have always valued my self-worth and put effort into keeping my mind fed with spiritual and positive affirmations and pampering myself at home/spa, etc. I always knew God made me unique, and I’ve embraced my blessings. The blessings I was foolish not to embrace in my younger years, I’ve learned to smother with a huge Bear-Hug today! I love me, and that is why I’m always striving to have a center of peace, happiness, and love overflowing from my being.
DeDe, LYFF Phoenix Feature, “I’m learning to live for what makes ME happy.”
What actions demonstrate the self-care you provide to your mind, body, and soul? (Exercise, healthy eating, spiritual practice, etc)
Unplugging from the “in thing” to do helps me center my mind and spirit.
Give me a great novel, tea, and quiet time to myself – just me, my thoughts, and positive affirmations or soft music – and I come out of this peaceful place freshly revived! Reading also allows me to get lost in an adventure while blocking out life’s distractions (work, social media, errands, etc.).
Exercise rejuvenates me, too, in so many ways; and it’s one of my biggest stress relievers. Dancing is self-expression and makes me feel free.
Spending time with positive women also makes me feel alive!
Having a church home helps me start the week in touch with my faith and provides spiritual rejuvenation. It’s also my check-and-balance for the life I want to live, along with daily morning and evening prayer to center and nourish my mind, body, and soul.
Is there an obstacle or challenge that you’ve overcome that led you to a deeper love for who you are?
An obstacle I overcame was learning to say no to things or people that do not enhance my life. I’m learning to live for what makes ME happy. I learned by going through a divorce how to make better choices for the right reasons. It was a difficult decision, but because of the experience it strengthened my friendship with my ex-husband and gave me deeper understanding to ask the following questions: (1) What would I do if fear wasn’t a factor? (2)What is the lesson in this experience?
What have you learned from self-love?
In the words of the late, but great Whitney Houston I’ve learned “…Learning to love yourself is the GREATEST love of all.”
Thank you for sharing your LYFF story with us, DeDe. You are definitely a Phoenix Rising!
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If you’d like to share your self-love story with The Collective contact us here.
Love Yourself First! Friday is a bi-weekly self-love series created by The Phoenix Rising Collective. Beautiful, diverse women tell stories of triumph, share personal affirmations, and declare love for their lives! The series is meant to inspire and empower women to fiercely demonstrate self-love in action in order to build and sustain healthy, positive self-esteem. Be sure to read some of our other inspiring stories.
IT’S A NEW YEAR, and here’s to a new you! Let me introduce myself: My name is Megan Weidner; I am 34 years old, a mother of three kids, a wife, an tree-hugger environmentalist by day and a fitness junkie coach by night. I own and operate Rock. It. Fitness – an energetic, effective, and FUN in-home, online and group fitness bootcamp.
Megan, Health + Wellness Contributor: “In all seriousness, moving is essential and every movement counts.”
Fitness is much more than dieting and taking a few classes at the gym – it is a lifestyle, and as the health and wellness contributor for The Phoenix Rising Collective, I hope to inspire you to live a healthy, happy, and prosperous life through activity and healthy eating. My disclaimer: All of my exercises are suggestions. I am not a nutritionist but through my own experiences, life choices, fitness training and reading, I believe I have the knowledge, and definitely the passion, to help you create a new you in 2015. So here we go… ACTIVITY TIP: “I like to move it, move it…I like to move it, move it…I like to…MOVE” (If you’re a mom, dad, aunt, grandmother, sister, cousin, or teacher you know EXACTLY what movie this is from and you just danced in your chair). In all seriousness, moving is essential and every movement counts: Walking out to the mailbox, walking to the copier at work, playing with children, dancing, and of course, biking, running and lifting. In my classes, I use a method called TABATA; it is awesome, and with an awesome workout you get awesome results. Tabata pushes your body into the anaerobic zone; the zone where the body is forming lactate and promoting strength, speed, power, and muscle-building – basically where all of the good stuff is happening. Tabata is a form of “high intensity interval training”, but please don’t be intimidated by all of those words; you can turn anything into a “tabata”. A tabata exercise means that you are taking your current level up a notch or two for twenty seconds, back down to normal for ten seconds, then back up for twenty seconds and repeating eight times for a total of four minutes. Try adding this to your walk around the block or on the treadmill: After warming up, increase your speed or jog for twenty seconds, then slow down or walk for ten seconds, and repeat eight times. The up-down, up-down is the basis of interval training and is going to push your body into the anaerobic zone. It will also give you noticeable results when you use it weekly. Your energy levels will increase and your endurance will improve. You’ll start to tone, lose pounds, and gain muscle. And, oh my goodness, I almost forgot to tell you one of the best things about tabata: EPOC or Excess Post-Exercise Oxygen Consumption. This is the period after your tabata workout, up to four hours, marked by an increased rate of oxygen intake when your body is returning to its resting state; however, while it’s returning to that resting state, it is continuing to burn calories and tone! There is SO much to share, but I think starting with a little exercise tip is a good way to begin my journey with you and 2015. Please share your fitness questions in the comments section; I look forward to connecting with you. Learn more about Rock. It. Fitness. Be well.
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About the Contributing Writer:
Megan Weidner is the Health + Wellness contributor for The Phoenix Rising Collective; she is a fitness coach and environmentalist in the Akron/Canton, Ohio area. She manages a global sustainability and corporate responsibility program for a large multinational company; her areas include environmental compliance, social equity, community engagement and health and wellness. Megan is also devoted to Rock. It. Fitness., her fitness and natural skincare business. She is committed to making the world a better, more environmentally friendly and healthier place through motivation and education. She is certified through AFAA and Tabata Bootcamp. She has a B.S. in Soil, Environmental, and Atmospheric Science (University of Missouri), a Graduate Certificate in Environmental Management and Policy (University of Denver) and an M.P.A (University of Missouri). She lives in Green, Ohio with her husband and three kids.