Dolores’ inspirational story is one of self-discovery and healing, a lesson in courage and the power of believing in what you want for your life – and knowing that with patience in (and with) the process you can have it.
Dolores decided to divorce her husband the winter of 2009; she knew in the beginning of their relationship that their values and goals for life were different. She is a very spiritual person. He is not. She wanted a family. He did not. But she wanted it to work. “When we first met and married we were in love and had the best intentions to be good for each other,” she says. Unfortunately, those intentions weren’t enough to keep them together, so with a lot of soul-searching – knowing this step would be the healthiest for both of them – Dolores made the very hard decision to let go after five years of marriage.
“My divorce has been the most painful experience of my life. Being by myself was not easy. Nonetheless, it only took a couple of years for my life to become much better than I ever expected. I made it by praying,” she exclaims. Having to redefine herself after years of ‘building as a couple’ was tough, but with spiritual guidance she realized the importance of self-love. So that’s where she started! She went on a journey of self-discovery by practicing yoga and meditation and attending silent retreats to get more in tune with her life. The more she honored herself, the more she blossomed. Dolores took risks and began doing things she always wanted (solo)! She explored her growing interests: got a bike (and went on long rides), joined cooking and Latino clubs, went zip lining, volunteered at her local library helping students with math, continued her spiritual development, strengthened her friendships with her girlfriends, and even joined Match.com (Yeah, you heard us the first time!). She was open to new and different experiences and didn’t judge them as they presented themselves.
It’s been two years since her divorce, and many positive things have happened because of Dolores’s courage to let go – a new promotion, a new home, a new perspective, and even a new love, but the best of all these things is the newfound love she has for herself.
Thank you for sharing your LYF story with us, Dolores. You’re definitely a Phoenix rising!
Happy Friday.
Love Yourself First! Friday is a weekly self-love series created by the Phoenix Rising Collective. Beautiful, diverse women of color tell their stories of triumph, share their personal affirmations, and declare their love for their own lives! The series is meant to inspire and empower women to fiercely demonstrate self-love in action in order to build and sustain healthy, positive self-esteem.
This is Monique’s representation of the commitment she has made to put herself first. (Good for you. We love that.) Monique told us that over the past year she has come to appreciate “alone time” because these are moments that allow her to rejuvenate and prepare for the next day. She understands the importance of solace as it helps her concentrate on being happy, and she says, “I deserve to be happy.” And we totally agree, Monique!![corrine[lyf]](https://phoenixrisingcollective.org/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/corrinelyf.png?w=342&h=340)
This photo of Corrine represents her transition back to natural hair. She paced herself through the process and took a year to learn how to take care of her natural tresses (including what products work best for her hair type and the benefits for her overall health). Corrine says, “Today I’m rocking a ‘fro, which is something I didn’t feel comfortable with a few years ago. I’ve grown to love me, which started with loving my hair! Going through this journey helped me realize I can accomplish even more.”
These are some of the ways this beautiful doctoral student, Simone, loves herself first: writing poetry, showing gratitude for her resilience/talents/opportunities, and laughing. (We love that!) She also says, “Eating well/clean – I try my very best to eat well. I have one 
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